Handling things out of my control
So recently life has kind of been knocking the human race. We've had to deal with the panoramic (Covid-19) and all the struggles that come with it. Many people have lost loved ones, we've been cooped in our homes and some have lost their jobs.
It's a whole period that's been out of our hands. Going into 2020, my goal had been to be more social, to go out more and meet more people. Low key I was also hoping I'd meet my future boo.
I started the year without a job, so I couldn't really afford to be social. My hope at the time was that once I got a job, I'd go all out and meet with everyone and live life.
Except the pandemic hit us and the plans I'd dreamed up vanished. They were fickle and little plans , but they meant something to me.
I'm not the most outgoing person. Don't get me wrong, I'm super hyper around close friends and family and sometimes people wonder whether I'm on crack cause of my enthusiasm. But, the moment I leave my house and get into a social setting with many people, I close off and just sit with my phone in my hands, while singing a random song in my head. (I sound cuckoo loooool)
My point is we all had plans going into 2020 and they've been derailed in some way because of circumstances outside of our control. The unfortunate thing is that the pandemic wasn't the only issue some of us had to face. While I got a job in this period (thank God), some lost theirs, others lost security and people didn't just lose their lives to Covid-19.
Nope, life still continued, so people were still dying of natural causes and diseases, accidents and most painfully policy brutality, racism and just plain cruelty.
This whole period has thrown me emotionally and I've felt so powerless several times in the past year.
So what do I do when I feel overwhelmed?
First and foremost I go to God. There's something so beautiful about crying to God and letting God know how you feel. I've done it a few times and each time I've cried to God, He's found a way to wipe the tears from my eyes. He answers guys, I promise you, God really does answer. He makes the day bearable and before you know it, you'll find yourself smiling and laughing.
I focus on each day. I face each day as it comes and handle the little and smaller issues that I believe I can handle. I make a plan for that day and tackle what I know I can and leave the rest to God. We can't handle everything ourselves guys. It's not possible, life always happens. So do what you can and respect yourself, don't lash out at yourself or belittle yourself for not having the power to change certain things, just accept it and love yourself.
I listen to music, I focus on the good things, the things that make me smile or make me giddy. 2020 was the year my eyes were opened to the wonders of Kdrama. Don't knock it till you try it guys!!! My favourite Bible verse is Philippians 4:8 which says "fix your thoughts on what is true, and honourable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." I'll always respect Nigerians because in the midst of so much hardship, they always find a reason to laugh. They find humour in the darkest of places and times. It doesn't mean they don't feel the pain, it just means they find ways to alleviate the pain.
Randomly dance, do something cathartic, sudden and fun. Take your mind off the things that you can't control and just let loose. Let your frustration, anger, fear, pain and stress out. If you need to scream, please do it. If you need to run, go ahead and run. Most importantly, if you need to cry, please do. Feel your emotions, accept them, acknowledge why you feel that way and if you don't know why you feel so out of control, acknowledge it as well. Let it all out.
Finally, but not really finally, Love!!! Love where you can, help where you can, give where you can. Make an impact where you can. The lives you touch and those you help will value it and in helping others you gain value. Refusing to help others when you can won't help you feel less overwhelmed, instead, because you've helped someone you'll feel more in control. You never know where your helping hand will come from, so if you can, please help others.